Home > Crazy, Dysfunctional, Embarrassing, Family, Funny, Kids, Life, Mothers, Parenting, Sex, Women > Top 5 ‘God, Help Me’ Parenting Moments

Top 5 ‘God, Help Me’ Parenting Moments

5. One afternoon I took my four year old girls with me inside one of those open dressing rooms for women. After ten minutes of observing the women around us, the younger of the two points to my breasts with an extended arm and says loudly, “When do I get those? I like them.”

4. I came home from work to find my potty training three year old son sitting on the toilet. He’d been waiting the last ten minutes for someone to wipe him while my older son kept telling him to “wait for him to finish playing Madden on Playstation 2”.

3. In doing the laundry a small and lumpy brown turd rolled out from underneath one of the piles. I couldn’t determine if it came from one of the children or our dogs. (This has happened to me more than once.)

2. I realized that my girls had been using my body loofah to clean the shower as a “surprise” for mommy.

And the, by far, worst “God, help me” Mommy moment is……drum role please…

1. I discovered that my sons, both under eight at the time, found the battery operated friend in my nightstand and had been swapping out batteries for the last how many months with any of their toys that required AA Duracells.

**Honorable Mention**

The time our girls asked me accusingly in a crowded waiting area, “Why do you tell us we can’t jump on our beds, but you and Daddy jump on your bed every night?”

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  1. singlemamatalesitall
    December 19, 2010 at 4:38 PM

    I laughed out loud! I am glad to be following your blog.

    • December 21, 2010 at 9:51 PM

      Always a pleasure to make fellow bloggers and friends laugh, even if you’re laughing at me. 🙂

  2. December 20, 2010 at 8:29 AM

    Hilarious!

  3. ventamatic
    December 21, 2010 at 8:29 AM

    thats too funny, i just want to thank you for finding me, your blogs are great.

    • December 21, 2010 at 9:52 PM

      I’m glad I found you, too, and that you always visit. Ladies that vent together, stick together.

  4. December 21, 2010 at 9:40 PM

    Maria, Good stuff. Very funny. My kids (twins) aren’t quite two so the embarrassing moments haven’t started to pile up yet, but I’m sure they will. I like your approach on this blog – very inspirational. I need to rant more myself.

    Jared

    • December 21, 2010 at 10:28 PM

      Indeed, ranting can be good for the soul especially when done properly, with a touch of humor and a glimpse of hope. Thank you so much for catching the inspirational aspect of my blog.

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