Are My Children Mentally Deranged?

Here’s a scene from dinner a few months ago, not quite sure what to make of it.

Mom: Where’s Taylor?

Rodney Jr.: In her room.

Kayla: She’s still trying to get out.

Mom: Of what???

Rodney (nonchalantly): We tied her up.

Mom: What the?!?

Dad: GO UNTIE YOUR SISTER RIGHT NOW!

Rodney: We hog tied her, it was kinda’ cool.

Mom: How the h*ll do you even know what and how to hog tie anything? (I  run my fingers through my hair in exasperation and make a mental note to ban them from watching anymore of Spike Channel’s MANswers.)

Kayla (protesting): But she wanted to be tied up, she wanted to see how long it took her to get out .

Dad: UNTIE HER NOW!

AJ (after he passes Taylor’s room and doesn’t help her): Hey, why is Taylor on the floor all tied up?

Kayla & Rodney (one echoing after the other): She’s practicing getting untied.

Taylor (tied up and yelling from her room): I’m almost done. I’m almost through the ties on my feet. Save me some foooddd, please.

Dad: One of you untie your sister so we can eat.

Kayla, AJ, & Rodney (in unison): NO!

They continue to eat as if there isn’t anything wrong with this picture.

Mom (too tired and hungry to argue): Leave it, she said she’s almost untied herself anyway.

Five minutes later Taylor comes down beaming with pride.  She apparently bit through her restraints.

I’m thinking, in the least, my family isn’t normal.

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  1. January 17, 2011 at 12:40 AM

    awesomely funny! reading more.

  2. January 17, 2011 at 9:14 AM

    LOL! I love ur kids! Tell em to keep up the good work 🙂

  3. January 17, 2011 at 9:21 AM

    aaah…. maybe you have the next great Houdini on your hands!

  4. January 18, 2011 at 12:12 AM

    I’m confusedly split between howling with laughter and quietly going “OMG!”
    My kids haven’t managed anything this dramatic (that I know of at least) but I DO remember getting into vast amounts of trouble for holding my sisters head underwater. Sadly the heavy punishment never took account of the fact that SISTER not only demanded that I do it, but said she would thump the daylights out of me if I didn’t because she was wanting to test how long she could hold her breath under water.I felt that it was deeply unjust that my parents chose to completely ignore Sister part in the whole thing. Yes of course we were very young and I didn’t realise possible consequences but as usual she got off scott-free for her bullying ways and I was left to face the music.

  5. January 22, 2011 at 4:11 PM

    I’m smiling over this one. Especially because I can relate to Taylor. I would have relished the opportunity to play Houdini. Or hostage.

  6. playfulpups
    January 26, 2011 at 1:39 PM

    Awesome!!

  7. Danielle Hamilton
    January 30, 2011 at 1:56 AM

    Love it Maria! Not wierd @ all…I can so relate.

  8. MG
    March 6, 2011 at 9:26 AM

    hahaha this is great! apparently my older brother duct taped the younger one to the garage door when they were kids…I’d say that is much more deranged.

  9. JayDee
    March 7, 2011 at 1:03 PM

    Not mentally deranged but determined. It goes to show Taylor’s trust in Rodney and Kayla. Who else but her bro & sis can do this for her??? Her determination to see if she can accomplish this act should tell you, she will be willing to try and succeed in all she puts her mind to.

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